I made up my mind, and it is final!

Absolutely, as it already said from the title, I've made up my mind. I need to not think about 'that' girl anymore. As she didnt like me at all, in the end. Why should I care about her anymore, as she never care about me and my feeling. I tried hard, but she always resist it. How should I do? Well, nothing, I guess. I just need to forget that girl, let her be what she want. I dont care anymore. If, let's say, she likes me, I also dont know what to do too. Thinking of her is just like hurting my heart. I know it is a lil' melacholic, but it's true. Argh, I just want to emphasize that I dont care with her anymore. But i dont want to be a mean guy anymore. I will still consider her my friend. Maybe that's the best way. That's it! It's a commitment, and I will kept it!

Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus

Yes, it is true things in this life. It is hard to understand what is in a woman's head. Easier for men understand themselves, and oppositely, women undersatnd women. What I want to stress out is I really dont know what is on 'that' girl's mind. Sometimes she act like she is really sweet and nice, but on the other hand, she is a meanie girl. I thought, i stress out, that in my mind, she plays me. And I think she think it is funny.
Now, it is already 99% the relationship will not work, I will ask for the 1% later, maybe the right time is on my fren's daughter birthday. And if only she came too. If she didnot come, I will ask by phone. Man, I cant bear it anymore. This is the first time being played by a girl (note, a girl, not women yet)
I already message her and want to clarify that, but it seems she didnt answer it yet. Day by day is seem harder and harder to be passed. Everyday is seem like always raining and dark, there's no bright day anymore in my life. I know there are still others' life more complex than me. But, I just one a simple and happy life. That's it, and that simplest thing is seem so far away. How useless I am. Too passive and no competition. So dumb, stupid, moron, what else need to be said.
I want to clear the doubt in me and also her. Although I guess that the answer will be negative, but sometimes, human pray for miracle too. I do that too. But, never hope too much. As if you daydream, and hope too much, you will surely feel down. In this moment, that's the thing is on my mind. I will wait till the day come, and wait and wait. Feel so pessimist, but that's how I feel right now. Why she doesnt want to tell the truth thing too? If she doesnt like it, why not just tell me, and it is over. Both party happy live ever after. Is she nasty? or what? Is that her real attitude? I admit that I really jealous to my fren, why? Becoz she seems can talk to him very closely, why I cant? Why she didnt do that to me? Or am I just too stupid? I realize and admit that I'm stupid. But, please? Can somebody give me another chance. I need time to learn too. I will improve tru time. But the world seem doesnt like me and didnot give me another chance. So, I think I just can accept that, and still continue with my life. Life o' life, so bitter, yet so sweet. So deadly, yet so alive. So dark, yet so bright....
I have another question need an answer too: Why this all thing happened to me?